Summary
Kingdom Hearts, the first in the series of Square/Disney crossovers that got larger than anyone thought it should or it really needed to, introduces us to (Tidus) Junior, his suitably Square-ish friends Riku and Token, and his traveling companions Donald "@%$#!!!" Duck and Goofy. Just kidding--if Kingdom Hearts introduced you to Donald and Goofy, it probably also introduced you to concepts like "videogames" and "televisions" and "life outside my cave."
| Recap terminology
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| Game term
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Recap term
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| Destiny Islands
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Isle of Wankers
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Relationships
- Junior/Riku: Look, this ship is horrible and we do not support it, but Junior/Token and Riku/Token are straight ridiculous. Get out of here with that nonsense.
- Junior/Junior's Keyhole Harem: Whichever pretty human child Junior is supposed to be with, it cannot be denied that he has been hitting and quitting keyholes the galaxy over. It'd be a lot easier for him to find them all if he'd just check Grindr.
- @%$#!!!/Goofy: Obviously.
Tropes
- Oh my God, the door metaphors. And the non-metaphors.
- Heroes' actions being completely at odds with their stated goals (Sora talking about finding Kairi and doing literally everything but trying to find her)
- Every boss is a penis, every world is covered in penises
- The Power of Friendship™
- Horrible, horrible mini-games
- I'm a pedophile and it's okay! (Geppetto)
