Final Fantasy X

Ff10-header.jpg
Recapper(s): Jeanne
Begun: 2.13.02
Completed: 4.28.04
Total recaps: 23
See also: Final Fantasy X cast

Summary

The first Final Fantasy game for the Playstation 2, Final Fantasy X should be a showcase for the big developments of the time like voice acting and vastly improved in-game graphics. Instead it becomes a showcase for Tightass, the lamest and whiniest hero in the series to date and possibly ever.

Recap terminology
Game term Recap term
Luca Goers Luca Butt-Designers
Evrae Squally Dragon
Mi'ihen Highroad Mi'ihen Dirtroad

Relationships

  • Tightass/Yuna: It's sad and disturbing, but it's also impossible to avoid talking about. That doesn't mean we have to talk about the pond scene, though. That would be mean.
  • Yuna/Seymour: Notable only because they did kind of get married. It's gross, though, so let's not discuss it.
  • Wakka/Lulu: Since Spira is apparently fucking Westeros, when Lulu's fiancé Chappu dies, his brother Wakka steps up to marry her in his place. Lulu, for the most part, does not seem into it, shockingly.
  • Yuna/Lulu: It's mostly alluded to for fanservice purposes, but it makes a ton of sense that these two would abandon the men scripted to be their lovers and take up with each other instead. It also nicely foreshadows Yuna letting her lesbian flag fly in the sequel.
  • Braska/Auron/Jecht: The sexual tension on Braska's pilgrimage must have been unbearable.
  • Auron/Kinoc: Borderline canon, since Kinoc gets to hug him. Hot.
  • Auron/Tightass: NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE

Tropes

  • All Talk: Tightass and Rikku keep saying they have a "plan" to keep Yuna from completing the Final Summoning and dying to defeat Sin, but really their only plan is to keep saying they're going to stop her somehow. As with most things in this game, Auron and Yuna herself do more to further their plan than they do.
  • Ambiguously Gay Trio: Braska, Auron, and Jecht were caught in a true love triangle during Braska's pilgrimage. Braska is clearly all hot and bothered for Jecht since he's mysterious, but Auron would clearly do anything for his High Summoner gentleman lover. Jecht seems slutty and would probably do both of them without batting an eyelash.
  • Fuck Jesus!: The Church of Yevon is a world-strangling cancer of an institution that only exists to perpetuate itself and its shitty beliefs and customs. And all the Maesters are ruling over Spira as undead, out of fear that their successors will be--gasp--too progressive and fuck everything up. Even the Pope probably wouldn't do that. Probably. Worse than all this is that Wakka, thanks to Yevon, is a brainwashed religious douchebag for most of the game and acts like a monumental jerk to anyone on the wrong side of the church, notably Rikku.
  • I'm a Pedophile and It's Okay!: Seymour is a gross creep who forces Yuna into a wedding and the second most barf-inducing kiss in the game. His pointy fingers have probably been places it's best not to think about.
  • Mary Sue: Yuna, as the beautiful, demure female lead, is obviously a Mary Sue, but the entire plot, Tightass's Story or no, revolves around Yuna's pilgrimage, the subject of Yuna's death, and Yuna's strong resolve to bring the Calm. And yet she's still not as bad as she is in the sequel.
  • Mini-games of the Damned: All of the mini-games in this game are paths to getting the ultimate weapons for some of the characters. Chocobo racing is bad enough, but knowing that the "reward" is a sword for Tightass makes it unbearable. Blitzball is stupid and only stupid people like it. And the less said about dodging lightning bolts or chasing butterflies, the better.
  • Omelette du Fromage: Auron has two favorite words: "Sin" and "Jecht." He likes to say them a lot, especially together, like "Jecht is Sin" or "Sin is Jecht." Also, Thongaladriel is extremely fond of the word "hope."
  • PENIS: Seymour's creepy pointy wang fingers (and probable pointy finger wang), the penis balloons in Luca, and Tightass's limp sword, to name just a few.
  • Shitty Voice Acting: James Arnold Taylor and Hedy Burress put on a fucking clinic of awkward, pause-riddled, flat voice acting.
  • That Was a Busy Year: Ten years ago, basically everything in the game happened. The information as it's doled out makes it sound like everything was a coincidence, except everything is a result the last battle with Sin: Jecht abandoned Tightass and came to Spira, Braska died and Jecht became Sin, the Calm started, Auron died, Wakka took up Blitzball, Yuna moved to Besaid as an orphan, and on and on.
  • The Cold Truth of War™: Okay, this isn't a Suikoden game, and it's less a war than a one-whale crusade against Spira, but still. Throughout Yuna's pilgrimage, notably starting with the carnage in Kilika, the party is constantly confronted with the horrors of death and destruction caused by Sin.
  • Too Dumb to Live: Tightass, obviously. And guess what! He actually IS too dumb to live! Yay! And he's never coming back, ever!

Misc. Notes

  • Current Ass Shot Count (CASC): Jeanne had to give this up pretty early because there are so many.
  • Wankese: Tightass really enjoys doing voiceovers, probably into some recording device he's been hiding up his ass the whole game. His girlfriend picks up his habit in the sequel, because life isn't fair.
  • This Is Your Story: People--chiefly Auron and Tightass himself--can't stop pointing out that this is Tightass's story. He's the lead! Of course it is!