Okay, that was a couple weeks ago. My time management so far in 2020 is on point.
Anyway! Part eight of Xenosaga II is here, and buried in the recap blurb is an epiphany I had about elevators, possibly influenced by Crisis on Infinite Earths, and definitely by alcohol. Enjoy!
ETA: Got some technical difficulties with the wiki that might take me some time to iron out. Will update. Sorry for the inconvenience!
We’re one year away from the site being able to vote and buy cigarettes! Very exciting!
Thanks for sticking around and reading for another year, gang! Today we’ve got a new installment of Kingdom Hearts II. Did you all want to discuss Kingdom Hearts III? Do you also think Flynn Rider is a dirtbag? Do you have strong feelings about which Attraction is the best? (It’s the Mad Tea Cups.) Have you been moved by interminable cutscenes of Org XIII losers talking to each other on top of phallic rock pillars? Well too bad, we’re stuck with THIS game for now. (Feel free to chat KH3 in the comments, but try to keep it spoiler-light if so!)
Happy anniversary to VGR, gang! Between this and watching a lot of young hot people in the Winter Olympics this week, I am feeling old as shit. And fittingly, on the 13th anniversary of me beginning it, here’s the ninth recap of Suikoden IV! That…sure is an average I’ve got going there. But this installment includes the greatest moment in this complete snooze of a game, so you’ve got that to look forward to!
As always, thanks to all of you for hanging out all these years and reading!
Hey guys! Thanks for sticking around for 15 years (Jesus) of recaps. That’s ridiculous. And please enjoy a new installment of Kingdom Hearts II! Roxas has a lot of boyfriends.
Happy 14th birthday to VGR! We are one year closer to becoming adult British homos with small dicks who can’t get any!
First, the good stuff. Today’s birthday gift in honor of us all is a new recap from Sam of a new game — Kingdom Hearts II Part 1! It’s thematically appropriate for the site’s birthday, given that it is packed to the gills with 14-year-old boys. You’re welcome!
Although I haven’t made a ton of progress on the site update in the last year (as I predicted, since I am a wizard), I want to say thank you to Sam for doing the heavy lifting in terms of content. Your recaps continue to be fantastic and just the right level of disturbing. Thank you also to Ben — I am glad you are still alive and contributing hilarious recaps to the site.
As always, thank you to all the readers and commenters. Without you guys, we’re just three people writing up perverted video game commentary as a personal hobby. But your enjoyment of the recaps makes us slightly more legit and less creepy. Seriously, though, thanks for your support!