Anyway, Chris scoffs at the idea of being in the limelight because it seems too soon to her, after their Captain Galahad and Vice-Captain Pelize just bit the big one. I know their names because Chris tells them to Tootie, like he wouldn’t already know who they were. Tootie spouts off some crap about knights relying on the faith of the people, convincing no one, as Chris’s boy serves up the tea.
Our lady knight sips her tea and wallows in her angst a little bit more, declaring “I understand, but there is more to life than being a knight…” Jeez, why can’t women ever be happy? Tootie asks her what her damage is about being loved by the people and being a hero. Chris shrugs and says she wasn’t expecting “all this.” I guess by “all this” she means “one stupid parade.” She stares into her teacup and sighs icily. Let me explain something about Chris that I talked about with Jeanne a while back: her range of facial expressions is not that, er, wide. She sort of goes from “icy” to “icy.” With this in mind, I bestow upon her the nickname “Ice Queen,” which will become more and more appropriate as the game progresses. Tootie pressures Chris the Ice Queen to be a willing hero for the sake of all her admirers (himself included). She continues her icy stare as the scene fades out.
Onto the third and final flaming hero at the Trinity Sight screen. His name is Geddoe, which I will now change to Geddy because this is my recap and I can call him what I want. Geddy has long, dark hair, a gaunt face, and an eyepatch, which gives him the air of Aragorn Son of Arathorn gone wrong. The scene begins, and all that can be seen in the dark is a bonfire in the middle of a forest. A person labeled as “??????” says “This means we must go our separate ways.” The scene is a bit inappropriate for a Journey monster ballad, but hey, it wasn’t my idea to say that line. Another “??????” guy says something about thanking the gods for their fate, whatever that means. A third “??????” person (or is it the first guy?) wonders just what that fate is. One of the “??????” guys says “Goodbye, my friends. Forgive me for not being able to go with you.” I would say this clarifies that there are at least three people talking, but that’s unnecessary, as three silhouetted figures can now be clearly seen. The other two give the first guy friendly encouragement at the end of the scene. Hmm, that wasn’t completely confusing or anything. I suppose one of those dudes had to be Geddy, making him our Man with a Mysterious Past. This trio of heroes is shaping up nicely, hmm?
The introductions of our main characters concluded, I decide to go back to Hugo for Chapter 1. Hugo’s tale picks up pretty much where it left off in the intro, as Hugo and Duckman enter a dark room in Karaya Village. They’re greeted by a maniacally grinning boy named Lulu. Yup. A boy named Lulu. One more notable feature about Lulu is that he has dark hair, which is a relief, since I was starting to think all Karayans suffered from the same bad hair-bleaching job. Hugo is surprised–and I daresay disappointed–to see that Lulu’s joining them for dinner, while Sarge is pissed off that they haven’t immediately been shown to a table. I’d never invite him over for dinner. Jerk. At this point the lady of the household shows herself and invites Duckman to dig in. It’s Lucia, the Karaya girl from Suikoden II. But since it’s 15 years later, she’s gone from the “bloodthirsty psycho” kind of hot to “maternal vixen” hot. Yes, that’s right, Lucia is the Clan Chief and Hugo’s mommy. Look surprised. Sarge and Lulu stampede outside to stuff their faces, but Lucia holds Hugo up to make sure he comes to talk with her later. Hugo nods and rolls his eyes in that “Whatever, Mom” way and goes to join his friends.
Don’t you make that face at me, young man!
Outside Lucia’s pad, Duckman, Lulu and Hugo are all bloated from their nice Karayan dinner. Sarge notes that Lucia looked to have her panties in a wad over something, and Hugo figures he should go have his “talk” with her now. I’m sure Suikoden fanboys everywhere would love to get The Talk from Lucia. Sarge says that she’ll probably lecture him for being away from home too much, since, y’know, that’s all moms ever do. When Hugo takes issue with that, Duckman laughs because Hugo doesn’t want to be labeled a mama’s boy. Well, he doesn’t laugh, per se. He quacks. Like, “Quack, quack, quack” instead of “Ha, ha, ha.” You know, I think we have figured out by now that Duckman is a freaking duck. It’s kind of obvious. Writers? Are you listening?
Don’t tease me like that.
Lulu mentions that he saw Hot Mom over by his house, so I finally get control of Hugo to go look for her. In chatting with various Karayan NPCs around town, I confirm what I already knew from Suikoden II: Karayas like fighting. A lot. Their favorite enemies, apparently, are the people of Zexen, whom the Karayans lovingly refer to as “Ironheads.” What a sweet term of endearment. Apparently Hugo is the pride of the village, being the strapping young son of one of their finest warriors. I would have never guessed. I take the opportunity to spend my little money on some potions and antitoxins, and spend some skill points on–wait for it–skills. Without these skills like “Accuracy” and “Repel” and “Damage,” our hero boy could be leveled up to high heaven and would still fight like an asthmatic six year old. I also find the local blacksmith, only to discover that weapon-sharpening in this game is already out of my financial means. I hate blacksmiths.
Now for the not-so-random Karayans. In one of the houses Hugo meets Anne, a vapid-looking Karayan woman who’s looking to open up a pub, though she says she’ll only be able to offer juice to Hugo. Is this going to be yet another Suikoden game where the dewy youth of our protagonist is beaten into our heads? I feel a migraine coming on. In another, Hugo encounters a man named Beecham. For those of you who remember every stupid line from Suikoden II like I do, you’ll recall a man referred to once in passing by Lucia, named Beechum. Apparently he’s changed his name in the past 15 years. And I hate to burst the bubble of everyone who thought Beech(a)(u)m would be cool and important, but he’s not. He’s just this scruffy old guy sitting around and whittling wood. Finally, Hugo runs into Aila, a girl about Hugo’s age who’s hanging out in the blacksmith’s shop, hunting around for spare weapons. I gathered from the NPCs Hugo already met that Aila is into fighting even more than your average Karayan, even though she’s just a silly little tomboy. She’s a girl! But she likes to kick ass! She’s an honorable Karayan warrior! If you don’t get it yet, don’t worry, because the game will hammer it into your feeble brain plenty more before we’re through.
Pillar of gender equality.
As Hugo nears the entrance of the village, the game goes into cutscene mode to show a Karayan guy repairing a suit of armor. Hugo greets the guy, named Jimba, and wonders aloud where the armor came from, since it’s not something Karayans would wear. Jimba says it’s from a “past acquaintance,” which is his way of saying “None of your goddamn business.” Lulu supports my theory and says that Jimba won’t tell anyone where it came from, not even Lulu, “his own brother.” These two are brothers? Jimba looks to be about 20 years older than Lulu and even disregarding that, they look nothing alike. Of course, for once in RPG history, this dissimilarity is intentional, and not just a problem with character designers on crack. But that’s a plot point for much later. Jimba says Lulu can know the whole story one day when he’s mature enough, which is obviously not now. Sarge disses Lulu’s immaturity, leading me to believe that Lulu must really suck, getting slammed by Duckman and all. Everyone has a good laugh at Lulu’s expense, me included.
Hugo asks why the armor is being kept outside if Jimba’s trying to protect it from the elements, and Jimba replies that their mother hates the smell of iron. “It reminds her of a cruel past,” he exposits. You mean there’s one Karayan in this town who doesn’t care for war? I’m utterly shocked. Said mother, a woman named Luce, interrupts this scene by greeting Hugo and calling him scrawny. The hell? Lulu’s skinnier than Hugo is. My amazement at Lulu and Jimba being related increases when I see Luce, a, shall we say, big-boned, dark-haired woman sporting a mustache. I don’t think she’s gonna make a run at Lucia’s Hottest Mom in Karaya Village crown anytime soon.